The Prodigal Son

How blessed are we to know that our Heavenly Father is always waiting with open arms to receive his lost children.  His compassion and grace are beyond measure and never ending.  It matters not to Him the reason for our departure, only that when we are ready to return He will be there to embrace us with His love.

If you have distanced yourself from your Heavenly Father, know that he awaits your return with open arms!  

Luke 15:19    "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him."

You Can Run, But You Can't Hide!

You may think you can run, but you can never truly hide—an old cliché that contains an enduring truth.

Like Moses, who fled Egypt after committing murder but could not escape God's call, we cannot outrun our sins or problems. No matter how far we try to go, God's purpose for our lives will find us. Moses eventually returned to Egypt to demand freedom for his people, showing that we cannot avoid what we are meant to face.

We must trust in God's grace and forgiveness, standing before Him with confidence in His everlasting mercy. Even when we feel like giving up because we’ve fallen short repeatedly, remember that God's forgiveness is boundless. He simply asks us to strive to do better and stay faithful to His word.

There is no sin too great for His mercy—if we truly repent, we can be forgiven. The next time you feel like running away from God, stop, turn around, and run to Him. His arms are always open, ready to embrace you with love and forgiveness.

Just a little advice to go!

Leadership Lesson: The Power of We!

It has been a while since I posted on this site as the imbalance in my life when it comes to work distracts from my ability to write, but I have been sending these leadership lessons to my team and I felt led to share this one.  Enjoy!  

The Power of "We" lies in our ability to unite our diverse strengths, perspectives and talents toward fulfilling a common goal.  Together, we create a force that transcends individual limitations, sparking innovation and fostering resilience.  This is precisely why scripture encourages us to be a "We", as reflected in Matthew 18:20, "...for where two or more are gathered in my name, there am I, in the midst of them."  As a "We", we can support one another, inspire changes, and build a brighter future.  Embracing the spirit of the "We", not only enhances our connections but also amplifies our impact, reminding us that together we can achieve the impossible.  Let's be the "We" instead of the me and I: let's be a team that comes together in the name of Jesus to serve the vulnerable with accountability, integrity, and a commitment to excellence!  God bless! 

Working Together As A Team!

Scripture tells us in Isaiah 41:10- Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.  In those most difficult times, we must remember we are not alone, because God is with us.  But it does not stop there; God works through each of us to ensure that we come together as a team to support and lift each other up.  

God teaches success is achieved when we come together as one body as one team committed to achieving the purpose for which we have been called.  The "we" will always outperform the "me".  Scripture reiterates this message as follows:  

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor-Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

As iron sharpens Iron, one person sharpens another-Proverbs 27:17

…that all of you agree with one another in what you say and that there be no divisions amongst you 1 Corinthians 1:10

How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity-Psalms 133:1

…let us consider how we may spur one another towards love and good deeds-Hebrews 10:24

From him, the whole body joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work-Ephesians 4:16

There are many other scriptures I can cite, but in the end, the message is the same, working in a silo will never lead to the success that can be achieved if we work together as a team. Teamwork is not an easy concept as it requires the ability to come together despite our differences, to understand the value each team member possesses, and to find a way to focus on the strengths while mitigating the challenges.  That is how we make the impossible, possible! 

Five Practices To Keep Your Ego in Check!

I wanted to share this insight I learned a while ago about keeping our egos in check.  The ego is defined as the I or Self of a person, a person as thinking, feeling, and willing.  It is one’s ability to distinguish oneself from others and the objects of one’s thoughts.   The “you” and your ability to keep the “you” in check are critical to how you lead others.  So how do you ensure that the “you” doesn’t turn others off, try applying these five practices to keep your ego in check:

Be respectful, be polite to others even when they are not so polite to you; a servant leader serves despite the difficulties/challenges others bring to the table. 

Be teachable, open to learning from others, you do not know it all even if you think you do. 😊  Read, read, read…There are a lot of great leadership materials that you can read and learn from. 

Listen more, talk less, I make a conscious effort to let others talk and listen to their point of view rather than always interjecting my perspective.  It is not a competition but rather a collaboration towards achieving the best results. Perhaps a challenging approach, but it is doable. 

Appreciate others for who they are if you appreciate each person for who they are, they will be more inclined to appreciate who you are.  Give credit to others for the goals that are achieved versus taking the credit.  Make it about the “We” instead of the “me”.

Relax, particularly when you feel yourself being triggered- take deep breaths and remember you control your emotions, not others.  Even the worst circumstances require that we maintain emotional control to respond intelligently. 

 

 

Hope For Tomorrow!

In Jesus’ time, people presented him with their problems and the challenges resulting from them.  You had the blind man by the pool of water, always trying to dip himself at the right time to regain his vision.  There was the man called Lazarus who was dead when Jesus arrived but alive when he left.  You had the woman who was a prostitute and was to be stoned to death as required by the law until Jesus showed up and proclaimed, let he who is without sin cast the first stone. There was also the tax collector who was one of the most despised in those times, yet Jesus chose to dine in his home and make him part of his team.  In each of those situations, Jesus didn’t see the obstacles but instead saw the possibilities, and miracles happened.  

We need to always hold on to God's promises and the assurance that all things are possible if we simply believe.  God's grace is sufficient to carry us through the storm into the brightness of the rainbow.  Today the world is often in a stage of chaos, full of impossibilities.  But if we view it through the lens of God's word, then we can come together and make the impossible, possible! 

Loving God's Way!

God gave us two great commandments outlined in Matthew 22:37-40. We are to “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

He does not stop there, he goes on to provide us His definition of love found in 1 Corinthians 13, which states: "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails..."

Practicing love as God defines it assures us we won't fail. Perhaps it is easier said than done, but I'm never going to stop trying. Just a little advice to go!

Unity In Christ

Today more than ever, we see the finger pointing and accusations of ungodliness and betrayal levied by christians against their family members, fellow christians, and even unbelievers.  I focus each day and morning on doing all I can to be Christ centered, a reflection of His love and His word, for His glory.  That precludes me from pointing the finger, something God had to reveal to me.  It demands that every thing I say and do be for his honor and glory, not for mine.  We are to honor each other as believers as we are called to love the broken and disenfranchised, to care for the lost, and to love others as Christ loved them.  

Let our actions serve not to glorify ourselves, but rather to glorify and honor God.  Neither will happen if our actions reflect condemnation and disrespect towards each other.  Christ saved us by His sacrifice on the cross, that we might be saved by His grace; His unmerited favor.  We should be praying for God to let our light shine so bright that others might see our good works and glorify God.  This is not about us, but about living every day for God’s glory, letting His light shine brightly.  Let us be united in Christ!  Just a little advice to go! 

Let your light shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.  Matthew 5:16

Always Being Right, Isn't Right!

There is nothing more competitive than seven boys living in a three-bedroom apartment struggling because of the poverty within which you are being raised.  You are trapped in that apartment competing for your mother's attention, competing to see who gets served first so that the quantity of food on your plate isn't less because you are last, competing to see who can finish first just in case there is an opportunity for a second serving, competing to see who will get the next new pair of sneakers because the money isn't sufficient for all seven to so you take turns, and so forth.  Yes, seven boys in a 3 bedroom apartment surviving off the income of a bartender, my dad's profession, leads to a great deal of competition, and that eventually leads to a battle to demonstrate that you know more than your siblings.

Imagine raising 7 boys pretty much all by yourself in a three-bedroom apartment.  Seven boys who despite your greatest efforts never stop competing for your attention and love, who are always competing to demonstrate that each is more RIGHT than the other.  With each of us only being about a year apart in age, we became competitive.  So, what does this have to do with always being right?  Well, the more competitive you become the more right you want to be and before you know it you are more focused on being right than doing right.  Yes, being right becomes blinding and your determination to be right can lead to alienating yourself from others, who would occasionally appreciate your acknowledging they are right.  It makes you defensive as others try to explain why you are wrong, blinding you to the opportunity to grow and learn from their experiences and knowledge.  

Age has a funny way of helping us expand our minds and begin to realize that so many of the times we thought we were right, we were actually wrong or no more right than the other person.  We believed we are right based on the knowledge we possessed at that point in our lives, but if that knowledge is flawed or based on a truth was not true, then we were wrong.  With age comes wisdom, the ability to think and act using knowledge, experience, understanding, common sense, and insight. It is often associated with attributes such as unbiased judgment, compassion, experiential self-knowledge, and virtues such as ethics and benevolence.   If you take time to think about past decisions you have made, you may begin to note how often you thought you were right and were not.  You come to realize that it is not about being right all the time, but about recognizing when you are wrong and learning from that mistake.  Perhaps you will realize, as I have, that being right is not as important as developing relationships with those around you and learning to celebrate when they are right.  Appreciating the positions of others and recognizing that discourse about contradictory positions is not about who is more right, but about the opportunity to build relationships and learn from the experiences of others.  

Today, so many are debating about why they are right and the other person is wrong, that discourse has become illogical and divisive. The need to prove that one position is more right than the other has resulted in the inability to think beyond the constraints of our own knowledge.  We are too busy trying to be right, we can't even conceive the fact that we could be or are wrong.  Today, I realize that there on more occasions thank I would like to admit, what I thought was right in the past was wrong.  I look back and think how foolish I was and how I need to be very careful to not be so focused on being right, that I fail to see when I am wrong.  Today, I am more than willing to let others be right and to respect where they are in their journey rather than focusing on always being right because that just isn't right!  Just a little advice to go! 

Reflecting God's Grace

 A while back I decided to quit facebook because I felt it was doing more harm than good.  Today, I hear from so many with Facebook accounts about the hard feelings and decisiveness resulting from postings by friends, family members, and believers regarding their positions on social events and politics.  What may folks do not realize is that Facebook, like many other social platforms, collects data on all of us which is then shared with or sold to others who use it to manipulate each of us based on our positions regarding faith, politics, social events and much more.  

For people of faith, critical platforms such as abortion and pro-choice are used to generate specific messages on our respective Facebook pages to lead us from one site to another bolstering our beliefs and demonizing anyone who believes different.  In the end, we become polarized to the point where we fail to hear another person's perspective or worse yet, react to it with anger and disdain.  In the end, we are more divided along political lines and faith from other believers, friends and family than ever before.  

Most concerning is the reality that people of faith have aligned themselves with positions that contradict the biblical teachings and principles critical to living a faith based life.  As people of faith, we cannot align ourselves with those who preach hate, condemnation, vindictiveness, verbal abuse, and physical violence.  We should not be manipulated into forgetting that we are called to love our enemies, to forgive them, to share God's word with them and to lead them by living in accordance with the biblical principles which are a testimony to our faith in Christ.  Included in these are the two great commandments Christ gave us, love the lord thy God with all your heart, soul, and mind and love your neighbor as you love yourself.  If we adhere to these two commandments, then we should find a place in our hearts for those who are different as demonstrated by Christ on many occasions.  We can impact those around us by the grace we demonstrate towards them, a grace that will help us learn to be respectful towards each other.  Just a little advice to go! 

Certain about Uncertainty

You can be certain that uncertainty is certain.  Perhaps a play on words, but the reality is that many leaders make the mistake of expecting certainty when life is everything but certain.  Good leaders understand that life is not linear, that despite our best efforts we will encounter unexpected obstacles and challenges.  The problem is not the obstacle or challenge, but rather how we react when they occur. 

Good leaders work to ensure they limit uncertainty but are prepared to respond when the unexpected occurs.  Rather than panic, make excuses, or look for someone to blame, good leaders react.  They take the necessary steps to rally the team to come up with a solution for overcoming the unexpected.  They trust their teams and their teams trust them.  That trust enables them to work collaboratively to find a way to overcome the challenge/obstacle and achieve the desired goal.  Just a little advice to go! 

Leading in Difficult Times

Leading in difficult times requires focusing on some basic leadership principles we sometimes take for granted.  The first of these is that we as leaders are given a great responsibility to care for those individuals entrusted to us.  We are leading people and thus responsible for their care, a critical reality considering the current pandemic.  It means adjusting expectations to account for the stress our team members are experiencing; stress related to working from home, to the fears of becoming ill, or resulting from a loved one being diagnosed with CoVid-19.  Whatever the cause, we need to remember that leading is not about us, it is about those we lead and ensuring they have the necessary support to navigate through this difficult crisis.  Those who have empowered and entrusted us to lead on their behalf expect no less of us as leaders.

Second, we need to remember that our leadership role is temporary, we will all move on from our current roles.  For some, it will be a promotion to another position or a move to another company for a more fulfilling role or better pay.  Whatever the reason, we need to avoid getting too comfortable and the assumption that our current leadership role is permanent because regardless of our tenure, we will move on.  This means we have a limited time to do our best, to lead with excellence.  It means staying focused on making sure our teams have all they need to be successful, that every team member is addressed based on their individual circumstances.

Thirdly, we need to remember that we are accountable for our roles as leaders.  We are accountable to those who have chosen us to lead and to those whom we have chosen to lead.  That accountability requires us to consider the type of leaders we are going to be, leaders focused on ourselves or leaders focused on those we serve.  Servant leaders understand that leading is about serving others, we provide balance to ensure we stay centered on our organizational mission and values, never sacrificing either because of any one person.  We do this while remembering who we are and ensuring we never bend on those critical values all leaders should practice.  Everything we do should align with being respectfully honest, practicing excellence, being accountable, and working as a team.

Leadership is difficult in any given situation but during difficult times, it is critical that we as leaders remember we are responsible for those we lead, that our roles are temporary or seasonal, and that we will be held accountable for how we conduct ourselves.  Just a little advice to go!

Second Chances

Are there no second chances for the young child of color today, second chances to grow up and play.

Second chances to correct a wrong, to pontificate with friends about a favorite song.

Too young to die, to old to cry, no second chances and the question is why?

Why not a second chance, for that young Black child, a chance to grow, a chance to smile,

A Latino child with the same exact smile, hoping to live more than just a little while.

Why not a second chance for that young man of color, that man we should all call our brother,

For that sister who is much like you and me mister; different in gender and color of skin, still undeniably our kin.

Second chances to escape an unwarranted death, death at the hands of the protector, neglecter, rejecter and disrespecter.

A second chance to smile, sing, love, hug, make a wrong right and live another night;

To overcome the hate, sexism, racism, and all the isms of this place, A second chance to make their case. 

Second chances, why not a second chance, first chance, Never had a chance...

Leading Change

Leaders need to be at the forefront of making change happen, a process that should remind us to focus on some basic practices.  Here are some helpful hints:

1. Think outside of the box, put aside the traditional way of doing things, and try something totally different.  Clearly, the same old thing is not working and thus the need for change.  An outsider's view might be helpful.

2. Focus on your strengths and not your weaknesses.  Use your strengths to ensure a successful change and focus on the strengths others bring to the table to compensate for the skills you lack.

3. Stay encouraged, a positive perspective is critical to determining the changes that need to be made.  The change team has to leave the negativity at the door and take on a win-win approach.  

4. Come up with a change plan, implement it and then revisit it to ascertain if it is working.  Change can be ongoing and modifying the plan may be necessary ensure the change will be successful.

5. When change happens and things improve, celebrate!  We often resolve an issue with some innovative changes only to then move on to the next problem before celebrating the one we have just resolved.

Remember that change is about impacting the things you can control and not the ones beyond your control.  Lead the change! Just a little advice to go!

Overcoming Isolation!

In a previous post, I spoke of the important of developing intimate friendships and avoiding isolation.  Never did I imagine we would find ourselves battling a pandemic that requires we isolate ourselves and limit our physical contact with those outside of our immediate family members.  In my previous post, I noted the impact of technology in fostering superficial relationships and contributing to our isolation.  But today, I note the importance of using technology to liberate us from our isolation.

I meet daily with my work team via Microsoft Teams, but we make it a point to turn the cameras on.  We get to see each other in our homes with all the interruptions that make the experience so much more intimate.  We have wives walking by the camera with their hair in a towel, children jumping up and down on the bed, dogs barking, leaf blowers sounding, school teachers zooming in and so much more.  These welcomed interruptions provide a glimpse into the daily lives of my teammates, it provides for a greater level of intimacy with people with whom I share a significant portion of my life.  It helps me serve them with a greater level of understanding, compassion, and appreciation.  The same is true for my friends and family as I can use the same technology to ensure a more intimate contact with each of them; contact beyond a simple text, voice mail or e-mail.  I can see and experience their daily realities and feel like I'm right there with them. How awesome!

Poet John Donne wrote the poem No Man Is An Island to remind us that every person "is a piece of the continent, a part of the main...".  We depend on each other for the social contact that helps formulate who we are and will become.  Technology can never replace the need for touch, the need to feel the presence of another, the vibrations of another's laughter, or the embrace of the one whose sorrow leads to tears.  But if used appropriately, technology can help us better connect with others and offset the isolation forced upon us by this pandemic.  Just a little advice to go!

The Truth Shall Set You Free

As leaders it is critical we understand the importance of being truthful, first with ourselves and then with others. Those who know me have heard me say more than once, "the worse person to lie to is yourself". Time has taught me that our desire to protect ourselves from consequence, the fear of consequence, leads us to deny or distort the facts around the truth. Much like a child's fear of consequence, we often rationalize our mistakes to the point of converting the truth into our version of events, a truth that helps us avoid consequence. But the fact remains that no matter how much we convince ourselves that the facts are as we want them to be, those who witnessed our actions know the truth.

We can deceive ourselves, but it is difficult to deceive those who witnessed our behavior, they are perplexed at our inability to accept responsibility for our actions. We set an example for those around us that when things go wrong, it is acceptable to distort the facts and blame someone else. We even have the audacity to judge others when they fail to own their mistakes without regard for the fact that we have encouraged their behavior because we are unwilling to own ours.

There is a biblical scripture, John 8:32, which speaks about being set free, not simply from the fear of consequence but from living a life of falsehood. It means living a principled life, one where being truthful comes naturally because it is what we expect of ourselves and others. It means we own our mistakes because we understand that owning them makes us better and reflects to those around us that we expect them to own their's. It recognizes our humanity and the fact that we are flawed and will make mistakes. It ensures that because we own our mistakes and the consequences of those mistakes, that we are astute in our decision making, willing to include the insights of others before making a final decision. These are the freedoms we gain as leaders when we make the commitment to be truthful in spite of the consequences. Practicing truthfulness, particularly when things go wrong, frees others to do the same and eliminates any accuses for their choosing to be untruthful. The truth shall set you free. Just a little advice to go!

Focus on the Content, Not the Package!

This past week, I attended a Leadership Summit sponsored by my employer, Endeavors.  It was an excellent growth opportunity and I have to share some of the knowledge I gained.  One of the speakers was Dr. J. Bruce Stewart, Managing Partner of Small World Solutions Consulting.  He spoke on the topics of Diversity and Inclusion, two areas I happen to be passionate about.  Dr. Stewart reminded me that despite all we learn, we need to continue to work towards understanding the value of diversity and ensuring we are inclusive of that diversity in our teams and decision making.

Diversity is more than just about one characteristic, specifically more than just the one trait we quickly focus on when we hear the term diversity.  If you have a room occupied by Black women, do you have diversity?  Many would respond to that question with a resounding no, because they have focused on one aspect of those in the room, the color of their skin.  But the reality is that Black women can originate from many different countries and speak different languages, thus their race has little to do with their diversity.  Their different cultures, experiences, and education provide for a group of diverse women making them all valuable, the content clearly more important than the package.  It is important to ensure these varying experiences and cultures have the opportunity to be included on our teams,  as they will enrich the team's knowledge and performance.

In the world of law enforcement, we often focus on one attribute when addressing the challenges we face regarding how police respond to people of color.  We have implemented a number of programs to ensure a diverse police force, but the challenges remain.  Perhaps, we have failed to ensure that we have a more inclusive police force, one that is more clearly educated on how we are all different and how we come to respect each others differences.  The same is often true in most work places where decisions are made without any effort to control for our biases, biases we all have and are often not aware of.   The challenge is to ensure we are being self conscious about our implicit biases so we can work to prevent them from hindering our decision making and become more inclusive of others.  Dr. Stewart offered three rules for inclusion, here they are:

1. Get of of your comfort zone.
2. Seek out and respect other perspectives.
3. We are smarter together.

Perhaps it sounds a bit simplistic, but maybe it is just as simple as each of us working towards figuring out our individual biases and ensuring we are willing to address them by getting out of our comfort zones, welcoming the perspectives others have and recognizing the value of working together with those who may be the least like us.  My challenge to each of you is to be intentional about educating yourself on how to overcome your own biases and how to become a more inclusive leader.  I'll continue to share on the topic as I educate myself, starting with my next piece about the three types of biases Dr. Stewart discussed during his presentation.  Please remember to focus on the contents on not the package!  Just a little advice to go!

Matters of the Heart!

Each one of us knows the importance of monitoring your heart health to ensure a healthy and productive life.  Good leaders understand the importance of monitoring the heart’s health when it comes to their thoughts and desires. There is a bible scripture that I love, it states, “Out of the abundance of the heart, speaketh the mouth” (Luke 6:45). Ensuring your heart is in a good place is critical as it will determine what you think, say, and do.  It is precisely what dictates the type of leader you are and will continue to be.  

Good leaders understand the importance of addressing those past lived experiences that often result in anger and bitterness.  Failing to address these hurts leads to behaviors that are predicated on the toxic voices from within, which often result in inappropriate behavior.  Too many leaders, despite having achieved great success, go on to fail because of their unwillingness to address their past hurts and the resulting vulnerabilities.  They make the mistake of believing that if they simply say the right things, that will make up for all the wrong things that continue to haunt them.  In the end, the “fake it until you make it” approach does not last and they end result is “heart failure”, the inability to lead.  

Becoming a good leader means confronting the matters of the heart, dealing with past mistakes, seeking forgiveness when appropriate, and ensuring the toxic voices are silenced.  Good leaders are not defined by their past, but their past has refined them and helped them to become better people and in the end, better leaders.  They address the matters of the heart and learn to be real, to be the type of leader that focuses on honor, excellence, accountability, respect and teamwork. Just a little advice to go!

Servant Leaders Are Mindful of Others!

It is natural for us to be mindful of the daily situations we encounter and to do our best to respond to them as leaders. Sometimes we respond based on how we believe the situation impacts us as individuals without considering how the situation impacts those around us, particularly those we lead. We react based on the eggshells with which we have surrounded ourselves ensuring none are broken or damaged. It can make us defensive and focused on self, rather than the interdependence we as leaders should be mindful of.

Great leaders understand the value of each team member and the importance of ensuring they are cared for, mindful of the eggshells each has surrounded themselves with. As leaders we are responsible for helping team members pick up their eggshells, in other words address those areas of sensitivity that often make them defensive and insecure. Of course, we need to start by first addressing our own eggshells so that we are able to step forward with the confidence and courage it takes to lead, teaching others how to navigate past their own eggshells.

I challenge each of you to picture yourself surrounded by eggshells and trying to walk through them without crushing them. What are those eggshells in your life, those areas of insecurity that often lead you to be insensitive, self focused, out of sync with your emotions, and unable to see beyond yourself. It is a challenge which I pray about each morning as I rise and celebrate the gift of a new day. How can I be more committed to the needs of others, a servant leader rather than a self serving leader? Each day I struggle to pickup the eggshells and focus on what those I lead need more so than what I need, to serve with grace and humility. Please hold me accountable to these words, help me be true to the commitment I’ve made to serve!  Just a little advice to go!

Be Resilient!

I can tell when I am really tired and letting stress get to me.  I start to sound like the nagging kid that moans and groans about every little thing.  Yes, I hate to admit it but despite all my efforts to not be that guy, I can easily become that guy.  Fortunately, I have team members who step in and give me the look, or say the word that let’s me know I’m being a bit melodramatic.  I do not always pick up on the cues right away, but the light bulb does eventually turn on and I figure out that I have put in too man y hours and need to get some rest.

If you are like me, you come home, lay down on the couch and watch the television in an effort to forget about everything, but that is just a different type of brain stimulator that often leaves you anything but relaxed.  I have come to realize the best way to relax is to find a quiet place, sit or lay down, and clear my brain of all the stressful thoughts.  It is a lot easier said than done, but if you stay focused it will help.  That may not work for you, perhaps for you a short walk or run helps.  The point is to avoid staying on empty, to recognize your resilience depends on your self care.  Find what works for you, the thing that relaxes and energizes you and make time for it.  Resilience is about having the energy, the wherewithal to bounce back to withstand the challenges and keep moving forward.  Being resilient means taking the steps to rest and reenergize yourself.  Be resilient!  Just a little advice to go!